We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
whose parrot is this?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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