I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
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