Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
