Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
