Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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