he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
