True but thats because hes a fetus.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
