oh god the rape fog is back!
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Randomize
