In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi