genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
