is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Hippo gnu deer
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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