He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
