if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
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Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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