You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
only if we run a train.
done.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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