Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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