Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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