So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize