So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
either way he was missing a nipple.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
