I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
