One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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