Your dad touched me again.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize