hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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