so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
