i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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