He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize