I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
