Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize