Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I love having hate sex.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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