Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
