thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
