just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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