her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
