where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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