this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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