Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think a kid would responsible me up
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
