the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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