Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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