so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
