I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
