I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
