this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
