if you like me you must not know who I am
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
You dont lie about slip and slides
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
