So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
