Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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