He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
