fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
