And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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