i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Randomize
