whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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