don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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