OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I know her cup size but not her name....
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